LOVE and other random stuff

First of all, I'm sending a BIG, HUGE, MUSHY CONGRATULATIONS to Kelly and Chad.
We can't wait to meet baby Leighton. (Nyla is still VERY excited :)
I just can't say enough about Kelly. She is the cat's meow, the rock to the jukebox, the awesome to... well, everything.
Kelly knows everything, and I mean everything about me. I don't have to hold back or hide anything, and I'm humbled that she trusts me enough to do the same.
She's been there always, without question, and WILL be there always, without question.
Obviously I'm oozing love today. I'm not usually mushy... I'm not even drunk.

Thinking about Kelly and how much I love her has really made me start thinking about some things in my life. Now, I have some sort of bizarre questions... or maybe they're actually statements. I don't know, you figure it out.

I'm in the process of simplifying all areas of my life. This includes my relationships... even with family (I should clarify that this is about parts of my family, mot the entirety). I know a lot of people are really close and connected with their family. I'm not. Does this mean that I have to pretend to be close just because we're genetically linked? We've all heard the quote "Blood is thicker than water". Well sure... in theory, but in reality IS IT?
My reasoning?? If a member of your family is basically a stranger, if neither of you are really into getting to know each other, and know you couldn't trust the person enough to tell them things that really matter anyway, why force it? If it was any relationship other than family, it would naturally phase out. Some people just don't mesh... genetically linked or not.
Basically, I'm at the point where I know myself better then I ever have. I know what I want and what I don't want. I know what I have time and energy for, and basically, I don't want to fake anymore. I think it is completely OK to wish people well, but let them go their own way, without guilt... whoever they are, regardless of DNA.

I think we do actually choose our family without being completely conscious of it. Think about the people you surround yourself with. Think about the people you can be yourself with. Think about the people you miss. Think about the people you can be HONEST with. When your world is falling apart who do you want to open up to? Who do you share your dreams with... even if they seem totally crazy?? Who KNOWS you?
In my opinion THIS IS OUR FAMILY! Sometimes our choices include our DNA linked family, sometimes not... and that's OK.
So, what do you think??? Anyone out there feel the same? Be anonymous if you want, I'm just really curious.

I know this is going to piss some people off. Its not about being angry or anything like that, its just where I am right now.

PS the Nyla update is still coming.

Maren, now and then.

I start to feel bad when I start getting emails asking for updates on the girls. I have great intentions of sending emails and pictures... but unfortunately I'm about as good at that as I am at keeping in touch over the phone.
I'm going to do separate updates because of the time factor. Maren today, Nyla tomorrow.

Maren is quickly closing in on 9 months! Wow, where did the time go??? I'm amazed by her... I can't believe the changes,the growth, the strength, the sweetness. We can already see glimpses of her sense of humor, and temper (holy smokes, watch out world!)
In some ways she's right where any other 9 month old baby would be, but in other ways she's right where she should be (just under 7 months).
She's sporting 2 tiny little teeth, and if her mood is any indication, ready to sprout about 8 zillion more.
Maren is crazy about Nyla. She smiled first for Nyla and now its obvious that Nyla is her hero. (When Nyla hears Maren cry she'll yell "I'm coming Maren!!!" and takes off at a dead run).
She says "Dada, Mama" and "Moo" and is working on "Nyla". She eats like a horse, and sings like a rock star.
She produces more crap then any kid I've ever seen, but its possible I successfully blocked the sheer volume of crap that is produced by babies from my memory.
She hates the stroller, loves the snuggli because she can look around and see everything.
She could bounce for hours in the jolly jumper, and especially loves it when I set it up outside. (The dogs usually curl up around her feet when she's bouncing).
So far, it seems like she's going to love animals just as much as Nyla. She giggles when she sees any of them (except the chickens... but I totally understand because they're shifty little buggers).
I really like seeing the relationship between the girls grow. I'm really excited to see them giggling away at their own private jokes and playing like sisters play.
She is truly lovely.

Then. 1 1/2 months old.

Now. 8 1/2 months.
What a little face :) Gotta love the olympic size pout... she knows how to rock the cute factor.

Party with the carnies

This weekend the annual fall fair and rodeo was in town, which provides a social outlet for all the town's weirdos... It's like a big ol' weirdo convention, complete with carnies, barf and cowboys.
I'm not one who generally gives a flying rats ass about 'fashion'. I do my own thing, so I don't judge others who have their own fashion freak inside of them. I do, however, have to draw the line somewhere... I don't understand how anyone could leave the house thinking its ok to wear a bustier, jogging pant capris and 4 inch spike stilettos. Am I alone here in believing that this is so wrong??
I remember reading a friend's facebook status a few weeks ago about how she was working somewhere and was faced with seeing too many butt cheeks thanks to the resurgence of short shorts. I laughed... until I understood her pain. Where to you look to ease your eyes from the damage inflicted by nasty ass, when it is EVERYWHERE??
We taught Nyla all about being private and covering what is supposed to be covered quite a while ago. So I was trying in vain to shield her from the endless parade of skanks, when a particularly skanky skank skanked on by. Nyla piped up and said, "I don't think she knows that boobies are supposed to be private". Wow... my little girl, almost 3 years old has more sense then 75% of the people we saw there. Amazing!

One thing I do love about the fair is that the local farmers set up a petting zoo for kids. Both the kids LOOOOOVED it. Nyla, being the outgoing and cutie pie child that she is managed to charm people into letting her cuddle the animals Elmyra style. When we were passing the goats she eyed one up and said, "Mommy, I could wrestle that goat". WHAT??? Sigh... for some reason this kid has been on a wrestling kick. Her big dream is to wrestle an alligator, or now, a goat. She's practicing on her teddy bears... She's so proud of herself I don't have the heart to tell her that she's nuts. If you happen to visit, be prepared to have a little girl fling herself onto you and yell "I'm wrestling you... FALL DOWN!".

The reign of the evil sun is OVER! We've had a full 24 hours of storming and hard, crazy rain. I LOVE IT! I love being able to go outside without feeling like my eyelids are vaporizing. My pale ass kids could leave the house without being slicked down in a vat of oozy, slippery sunscreen. Have you ever tried to hold on to a hot, sweaty baby who has literally been greased up? Yeah, go try it, its super fun.
But we survived. I'm the only one that cooked my melon to barf-it-up extremes... damned lost hat (which I found once the rain started... buggers).
My crazy, old lady neighbor told me that she was taking lots of cool baths.. as if that wasn't already too much info, she felt the need to tell me all about her heat rash too. SWEET! I must be getting too friendly, I should really start throwing things at her again.

Do you ever see something that makes you laugh a lot for no apparent reason? I saw this and seriously, every time I think about it I laugh.
Just thought I'd share, since laughing is an important part of life.


I'm going to admit something... I love 80s music (and 90s too). You know when you're driving somewhere listening to local radio and they bust out the great 'old' stuff. Come on people... who isn't instantly rocketed back to the past when you hear a certain Bryan Adams song? EVERYBODY has a Bryan Adams related memory (admit it you closet Adams fans). The great thing is that it doesn't even matter if you love him or think he blows, his music is still stamped all over our generation. Helooooo Robin Hood???
I want to know.. which songs instantly send you flying down memory lane? (Not necessarily Adams related).
To this day I love 'Wonderwall' by Oasis. It was pretty much played to death on radio, but it instantly brings me back to a really great summer before college. Lots of great memories, lots of great people... great times.
'Just like Jesse James' by Cher makes me think of the days of sneaking out, playing pool at Gus', Carmen :)
And I have my fair share of Bryan Adams related memories :D
I love that, I love hearing a song and instantly being transported to another time. I love all the great memories that are too easy to forget when we're supposed to be all 'grown up'.
Share yours!

Sizzle sizzle...

Man, I'm hot...
Again, I find myself complaining about the weather... (and you thought I was just being conceited).
For some reason, northern BC has become the surface of the friggen sun. I live in the north... we're supposed to be working on our igloo plans by now, not wilting and frying in the unceasing and intolerable heat.
Those of you who know me know that me and heat do not mesh. I get all wilty and floppy and barfy. Hard labor in the crazy heat is starting to make me delusional I think. I'm pretty sure I've been having conversations with people who aren't really there. If you happen to see me mumbling to myself, just let me be... I probably think I've found a new friend.

We were recently at a party for some family friends, all of the guests happen to be farmers of some sort. It was interesting and a bit creepy sitting around like all the other farmers, bitching about weather and heat and how we're all going to find enough hay etc for our animals... not to mention what its done to our gardens. OY! You know you belong when you can bitch along with the rest of them :)

Now, for something completely different.
When you're flipping through satellite channels have you ever noticed how weird TLC is? I've re-named it "The Channel of Horror and Disturbia". I don't watch much TV, and when I do the LAST thing I want to see is 'The Man with 6 Heads', or 'The Man With the Dog Face Transplant'.
Prepare yourself, my next comments are going to piss some people off...
I really can't stand all the shows about people with a zillion kids. First of all, I think if adults want to act like fools on TV for money then by all means, go for it, but kids don't get to make that choice.
There's a family with 18 kids. Yes 18 freaking kids!! I was talking to someone about this, and they mentioned that they have a really good setup, because the older kids are all responsible for a younger kid. They help them dress etc... WHAT? How the hell is that a good setup?
So, the older kids get stuck parenting their siblings... right, that's just super for them. In my opinion, if someone has so many kids that they have to get some of their children to help be parents, then they have too many damn kids! PARENTS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THE PARENTS.
Now, I know some people will argue that this responsibility teaches them to be good parents. I call a big ol' bullshit on that. Being a good parent to your child teaches the child about good parenting, not forcing them to be parents when they're still kids themselves.
Seriously people, if you're expecting your kids to help do your job, then you need to re-think your plan. Its not ok to rob kids of their childhood because YOU choose to have a huge family.
I agree that all kids should have chores and responsibilities, but they should all be age appropriate. (And really, there's a difference between occasionally babysitting siblings, and being given parenting responsibilities, so don't even try that debate).
I know people who were put in this position and believe me, it didn't work out well for them.
Rooooaaaar... rant over. See, boo to TLC.

On to the new farm. We're still looking for the right land. Its more difficult then it sounds. Then we have to decide if its better to find something with housing on it, or find something with nothing because starting from scratch - while going off the grid - is sometimes easier then converting. We have a house basically chosen to build, so what would we do with whatever happens to be there? But if we don't find something with some kind of housing already on it, where will we live while building a house. There will be so much building happening in the first little while, I can imagine the house will take a while to get done.
We've decided on a dome similar to this one. They are so energy efficient and there is less wasted space (I know it seems like a dome would be a huge waste of space, but it really isn't). My older brother (aka: Red Foreman)calls us 'damn hippies', but I'm willing to wager that he'll come around sooner then later.


Well, its time to slather everyone in buckets of sunscreen and head outside. Cross your fingers that I make it over to the llama pasture before turning into a puddle of goo.

Contest time!!

The time is drawing near and we need a name for the farm. I have a lot of ideas, unfortunately, with my humor they end up being inappropriate... and strangely enough seem to center around Irish slang.
Anyway, we've decided to do a NAME OUR FARM contest :) You're wondering what you'll win right??? Only the best prize EVER! We'll name our milk cow after YOU! hee hee hee.


Yes, its the real prize... doesn't everyone want a cow named after them??? (This isn't our cow. We won't get one until we move).






A couple hints:
It can't be tooooooo long
We like funny, or at least mildly humorous names
We're not really into fru fru names.

If you don't want to post them here, feel free to email them to me.
Alright you wonderful and imaginative peeps, let 'er rip!

My love for farming

It's interesting how something that came about by accident has ended up being the plan for our future. I can't believe how much I love it. I don't know why, because half the time its so bloody frustrating, but as I was weeding our mammoth garden today and was thinking about all the little things I love about being in the country and our little farm.
Here's my list:

1. Perfectly worn in work gloves.









2. It's so quiet here that I can hear a storm blow in.








3. Being totally physically exhausted from a day of hard work outside.






4. Watching Nyla's love for the outdoors grow, and Maren's total awe of everything she sees outside. I love knowing that my girls are going to be outside kids.









5. I love the smell of soil. Creepy I know... I love coming in from working in the garden and still being able to smell the soil (like now, I was weeding in the garden and still smell like it). Or when its been really hot and finally rains. That garden soil smell. LOVE IT.
OH and the satisfaction of seeing things that we've planted grow. HA! Take THAT supermarket!





There's so much more... sigh.
A lot of people think we're crazy for jumping into the organic garden. Yes, its a huge gamble, but when you already love and understand the lifestyle it isn't as scary. I think its scary to work years and years in a job you hate just to pay the bills. I think its scary that kids watch HOURS of TV and play HOURS of video games every day. And don't get me started on the food we're putting into our bodies!
Really, there's nothing new under the sun... we're just going back to how things used to be.
Have I mentioned yet that we're going to be off the grid?? Hee hee hee, pick your jaws up off the floor, its not as crazy as it sounds. It's something we decided we wanted to do before the idea of the organic farm came about. Our goal is for the farm to be totally self sufficient for power, etc.
I'm going to answer one question that a lot of people have been asking... YES we will have indoor plumbing. We're not going back to 1802 people!!
I'm happy, I'm REALLY excited, and I'm waiting not so patiently for everything to fall into place so we can get this party started. Cross your fingers that its all a done deal SOON!
Now, its not all fun and games. There are a few things I DON'T like at all...

1. Chasing effing llamas all over the effing countryside. Those rat bastards that took off are still gone and are now way off in Alberta. Don't ask me how we're planning to get them home...

2. BEARS! I don't feel I need to elaborate on that one. Coyotes are pretty annoying too.

3. Not having enough time to do everything that needs to be done. Days are too short.

4. Country friggen music. Just because I'm a farmer does NOT mean I love country music.

5. Crazy farmer neighbors. Good lord... I have stories. People are so weird.

Anyway, I have to go scrub the dirt out from under my nails... ewww.

Another day in the land of crazy

I'm getting more and more excited for our big move. I'm excited about the business, and being back in the mountains. I'm really excited about all the wonderful things that can be done in the mountains!!!! I recently had a GREAT idea, I'm going to install a zip line! I'm really jazzed up about the whole idea... just look at the pic below (ignore the fool in the helmet). Who wouldn't love that?? I'm going to do some research so that it doesn't end up being my own private death trap...
The only problem with being in such a great area is that I'm wondering how the heck I'm going to be able to get all the work done that needs to be done. The work for the first couple of years is staggering... mind blowing... freak show crazy! I'm thinking that if I don't take time to have some fun I'll end up all nutty like this lady... actually, she seems like a pretty cool lady :)

I'm sure I'll have lots of company in my crazy schemes :) Hurrah for great and crazy friends!! I hope you're all gearing up for all sorts of fun... you will not believe the ideas floating around in my head :) PREPARE YOURSELVES!! heeeheeehheeeeeeeee!!!!

PS: I will do more kid pic posts soon. REALLY!

Kiddos

I have not made good on my promise to email pictures to everyone... I'm so terrible I haven't even emailed pictures to Grandparents! That's the lowest of the low I know.
So, here are just a couple of pictures of the girlies. They're both doing well. Nyla is very interested in music right now. She doesn't care what the instrument is, she loves to play it. She especially loves the drums, harmonica, guitar and tambourine. I have a feeling she's going to be a throwback to the 60's :)
I have never in my life seen a soul with so much energy. She's definitely a twinkling star.

This is what happens when you let kids dress themselves. She chose jammies and an undie hat... yes, she's wearing underwear on her head. She liked the fact that her hair could 'see out too'.


Maren is so much like Nyla, but so different. She is the most laid back kid I've ever seen. She wakes up with a huge grin and generally has the grin all day. Teething has thrown a wrench into her easy going attitude, but she is just lovely. Cuddly, sweet and drooly. She is a bit disgusting at this point... she can crap up to her shoulders, barf all over herself (and me) and drool all over her face and down her stomach in the span of minutes. I seriously just want to hose her off sometimes...
She has no premie issues that we've noticed. She's doing full rolls and beginning to sit up a bit (supported). She's 7 months old and doing great.


So, that's a quick update. I won't even promise to send pictures anymore. I'll just say that eventually it will happen. Really...

Llama hunt 2009

We finally got the llamas sheared. A dude and his wife travel around shearing llamas... it was friggen crazy. How weird is it that this is how they spent their honeymoon???
First of all, our llamas aren't used to being sheared, so they were all pissy to start with. Thank god the dude was like the friggen llama whisperer! He'd stare them down then grab them around the neck and hold on while they had a melt down. I'm surprised he survived because they were out to dismember him! Finally they'd calm down and he'd give them a big loooong hug and whisper to them :) It would be sweet if it wasn't a bit disturbing... then he haltered them and led them into the llama squeeze to shear them. They put up a big fuss, pretty much hacking up every nasty bit of nasty in their guts and horking it out at us, but most are sheared.
Unfortunately a few were so pissed they jumped the fence and headed for fields far away.
The local farmers hate us and our dumb ass llamas. They've been threatening to shoot them if they keep hanging around their fields. We've been herding them home, but they make a break for it when we get too close. Good lord, its frustrating after chasing the bastards for miles and miles and getting sooo close to home, to have them turn and run all the way back to where you originally started. Next time I'm going to punch them. My peace loving soul is all freaky since moving onto the farm.
Recently 3 disappeared... I have a theory... you'll see below.

Pre shearing (I'm not supposed to have favorites, but she's my favorite. One of the AWOL llamas)

different llama post shearing (bahahahaaaaa! she looks humiliated :) This pic is for Christy

My theory of what REALLY happened to our 3 missing llamas.

Shifty farmers...
Speaking of shifty farmers :) We're coming closer to our big move. I'm sooo excited! We are shocked and amazed at how things are turning out. It's bigger and better then we originally planned, so stay tuned for some great updates. I'm probably experiencing 60% excitement and yeehaww-ness, and 40% total and complete terror. I need more zen in my life.

This time I'm going to keep quiet until we're ready to unveil, but prepare yourselves for sheer awesomeness.

Geez, I had a lot to share, but now I forget everything.
I put my hand in a huge pile of chicken crap. It's not news worthy but it was friggen gross.

That's all for now. If anything amazing happens I'll share.

Boogitty boogitty....

A kid (14ish) walked up to me in Walmart and asked me if I'm a Vampire. To be fair, he was jing-a-lingin high as a freaking kite... and apparently I'm "really f*uckin white" and have "freaky eyes"... come the hell on... my eyes are BLUE its not like they glow red or are oozing the blood of the undead.
What do you say when someone asks you a retarded question??? I just said yes, I am.
He said "Dope." Seriously???? "dope" is all you've got for me??? You think I'm undead and all you can say is DOPE??
I blame that stupid vampire movie for this.

I don't have anything against vampires. In fact, I'm pretty sure the crazy old lady at the next farm is a vampire. (I have evidence though... I always see her peeking out of the forest at me. She acts all shifty and vampireish AND I'm pretty sure she yelled when I kept whipping that garlic at her...). the reason I'm so pissed is because I HAVE A BLOODY TAN! When I see myself in the mirror I wonder who that brown girl is.. I'm more tanned then I have ever been in my entire life. Who the hell does he think he is to come and shit all over that? Little bastard.

I'm sure I have more to update, but I have company and I'm being rude and anti-social.
I'll be back...

Prepare yourself

Ok, just to warn you,this post will be full of cursing and yelling... mostly because of THIS GUY. Yes our bear has returned... bigger and badder then ever.

Well, this isn't a picture our actual bear, but this is how he looked when our dogs were trying to rip his stupid, ugly rat bastard face off. I hate this fucker. Seriously, seriously HATE him.
I'm usually a nature loving, peace loving soul, but this guy IS going to see the business end of my brand spankin' new gun. I don't care if I sound like a freaky red neck, I'm just so PISSED and so ready to blow this mofo away. (See, lots of rage).
This guy is the stuff that nightmares are made of, except its my REAL DAMNED LIFE! He stalks our house... he hangs in the garden behind the house and terrorizes the llamas, but as soon as anybody is near with a gun he disappears like friggen Houdini.
Our llamas have already had some bear related injuries and one fatality and I really don't want to see any more of that shit. Good lord...
He snuck up on me and Nyla last year, but THANK GOD we were in the barn when he came around the side. This is where I'd start screaming FUCK repeatedly, but I'm practicing some calming breathing exercises, so I think I'll be able to control myself.
Don't worry, we're being EXTREMELY careful when we're outside. I refuse to be prisoner in my home because of this bear, but we aren't being flippant or stupid.

On a more positive note... the garden expansion is going really well. It's HUGE! I love it :) I love all the manual labor that goes into it. I love the feeling of being physically exhausted from a day or hard work outside. I'm getting more and more excited for our new business... its going to rock the friggen casbah.
Unfortunately, since we've been working outside so much I'm neglecting my house. Have I mentioned how much I hate housework? UUUUGHHHH its like penance for all of my bad behavior.

I went to Edmonton ALONE over the May long weekend! I haven't been away like that for a very long time. It was crazy busy (I took the Bellyfit Instructor training... and LOOOOOVED it). It was nice to spend some time with Hannah and meet her man Nash. Cool cats for sure!

Other then that things are going on as usual. I won't post again for a while. Hopefully I'll have a disturbing murderized bear photo to share... I WILL be wearing his head for a hat, savage style.
Oh, I have a tan :) Its a MIRACLE!!!!! I'm no longer see through!!!!! sweet ass sun.
Now that I'm mumbling crazy talk its definitely time to go :)
See ya!

***Update***
The bear bit my friggen dog! He's in a lot of pain but VERY lucky. He bit right through his skin into the muscle under his doggie armpit. I have to carry the poor little guy around :( Now I have blinding rage issues.

A conservation officer finally came around to set some traps (not the scary ones with all the teeth that snap the animal's leg off).He hung some meat in the trees to test some kind of theory as well as setting pot snares filled with applesauce...
Now, me being a smartass said "Why the hell would a bear go for some applesauce in a pot snare when he can get his paws on some meat, regardless if he has to climb a little??? After all, this is a BEAR." Sure enough, all the meat is gone from the trees, a bunch of branches are snapped and the trunks are clawed up, and the pot snares are untouched.
SERIOUSLY??? Am I the only one in this godforsaken land of rednecks with a BRAIN???
Time for some land mines...

Catch ya later!

Spring/Summer is a busy time for most people, so I'm sure it won't be a shock that I've decided to leave blog land for a while. We're busy and have a lot of new and exciting things going on, and are also gearing up for a big move.

Blogging is great because it allows me to do one update for everyone, instead of trying to send pics etc... which I suck at... but one thing I really wasn't aware of was the blog politics!! Good lord, I'm tired of blog politics.
Here's a hint... If you find me offensive, don't read my blog. I know its crazy, but it just might work! And seriously... give up on the angry emails! I am who I am and that's not going to change...
H'mmm, obviously I have some blog issues... definitely time to take a break ;)

I will most likely be back now and then, probably closer to fall/winter. Hopefully I'll have some amazing and exciting updates to share!

Have a great summer everyone!
Thanks to Cindy for passing this on to me.


Bah hhahhahahahaaha! Sorry peeps, I don't buy into the hype :)

It's all about procrastination

Yup, two posts in two days... I'm amazing.
Actually I'm trying to delay the process of checking the weasel traps. ewwww.

Have you been listening to any radio lately? Local or satellite?? I'm shocked and a little bit disturbed. Everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY is doing an 80's re-make. When the 80's re-makes started making an appearance it was kind of fun, but now it seems like ANY song goes. Even the songs that were crap the first time around...
I understand why people are jumping on the 80's bandwagon. It proved successful for a few bands, but now its getting sad.
I remember a few years ago Tori Amos did an album that was mostly if not completely re-made songs. I remember thinking how lame that was, even for Tori. It takes the bare minimum of effort. Boooo I say!
Although, in all fairness, for some of these bands it could be an improvement. I absolutely cannot stand songs with lyrics that sound like one of your buddy's sad ass poetry. (PS: please don't ask me to read your sad ass poetry... please...) (By the way, Ruth, your poetry isn't sad ass).

Now, moving on to some music I'm enjoying very much. Maybe I should be embarrassed to admit that I like Lady GaGa so much... not to the point of 'girl crush'... but well, ok, total girl crush.
I'm wondering if anyone is immune to her music. Do you break out into dance when you hear one of her songs??? How can you not?
Next time I clean the chicken coop I'm sooooo bringing my ipod with me.

Speaking of cleaning the chicken coop... I had one of the most disturbing experiences of my life yesterday. I was cleaning up around the coop. We've only been here for a year and there is SOOOO much work to be done that we didn't even get anywhere near the chicken coop last year. Anyway, I found 2 buckets that were full of watery stuff so I dumped them before throwing the buckets in the 'haul to the dump' pile. To my complete disbelief and horror, the buckets were filled with HUMAN CRAP! So I was dry heaving and trying to keep Nyla away from the nasty crap, and realizing simultaneously that it was all over my gloves.
If I didn't have kids around me at the time you can not believe the things that would have come out of my mouth. I was thinking them very loudly... I would have made you blush.
Ugh... it still makes me shudder and feel creepy crawly. ewwwww. People are freaks.
Please, don't ever crap in a bucket and leave it for an unsuspecting soul to find...

Ok, no more procrastination. I'm off to catch a weasel.

Ah, farm life

There are 25 chicks coming to live on the farm in about 2 weeks(the chicken variety, not the human variety). I was excited about it until I started cleaning out the chicken coop and realized that it is inhabited by about a billion crazy weasels.
In case you don't know, weasels are the mob family of the rodent world and are really just happy to murderize unsuspecting creatures.
The dude at the local feed store said "oh yeah, those crazy little bastards will kill every chicken in a hen house just for fun". GOOD LORD! Apparently they aren't very easy to catch either. According to the same dude, not only are they "crazy little bastards", but they're "tricky little fu*kers" too.
I don't know about you, but I'm not into being outsmarted by a rodent. I've heard from various sources that the best way to get rid of them is to trap them in a live trap and then shoot them while they're still in the trap... right... it'll be like a redneck party.
Then, I was wondering what to do with them after the fact. I had a flashback to childhood... we had a really close family friend who happened to be about 8 zillion years old and a bit 'kooky'. She was an awesome old lady, but she'd send us little packages in the mail. These packages were nightmare material. She'd find dead birds and rip off the wings to send, she even skinned a squirrel and sent the skin for my little bro. She'd cut up her old bras and even include miles of IV tubing if she had been in the hospital. SERIOUSLY DISTURBING. So, given that I have a very 'special' sense of humor I was thinking about who might appreciate my own version of one of these packages. MWAH HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAA! I've seriously been laughing about it for 2 days :)

Other then that, things are progressing as they should. Spring might finally be here after the 2 day blizzard we just experienced.
The size of the garden is doubling this year. A test garden I guess you could say, in order to get ready for the big move, and new business. Speaking of the new business...I was talking to a family member the other day about the organic farm. He said 'It's just so weird, I can't picture you doing that'. Isn't it funny that people who are supposed to be closest to us sometimes know the least about us? Bizarre.

The kids are great. Nyla has been potty trained for a little while now. I know its just potty training, but I have to say that it brings an immense amount of pride. Successful potty training takes a lot of patience, consistency and an invested interest in your child. It feels like a huge accomplishment once its all done. All that time and care was worth it (obviously) :)
Maren is getting HUGE! Nyla was always a cute long, lean baby, but Maren is a cute little chubbo. She's healthy and happy and seriously has the most laid back personality.

One thing I find so amazing about being a mom, is that when something goes wrong in my kid's lives, it usually only takes a cuddle from mommy to make it better. I know it won't be like that forever, but for now, its just a wonderful thing that I enjoy very much and am a little bit humbled by.

Now, I'm off to continue the job of cleaning up the dog crap factory that we call our yard, and picking rocks out of the extended garden space. I live a glamorous life folks!

ahhhhh, spring...

Beautiful girls.

This spring has been so strange. Strange things happening, strange strangeness, just strange. I'm coming out of it all feeling incredibly calm... and pretty much like a superhero.
I should just get used to a life of strangeness. Yes, I'm the queen of vague :)

This isn't much of an update. Just wanted to share that I'm still kickin. I'm dancing through life to Lady GaGa at the moment.

I've developed an allergy to various alcoholic beverages. I happen to think this is retarded... before I was prego I could enjoy a glass of wine and not have my head explode like a puffy weird face. Its not like I need to drink to get through the day... most of the time ;) (don't worry, I don't drink to get through the day, I am JOKING) but I do miss being able to have a glass of wine, or whatever. Has this happened to anyone else??? Does it go away???

I have to get the nuts chopped off of our little boy llama. He's getting frisky... I don't want to be dealing with 8 zillion llamas... good lord...
I feel sort of bad about the whole nut chopping business, but I'm sure he'll understand when he's older :) Sometimes being a farmer is just bizarre.
I had to untangle a llama from a barbwire fence. I was obviously trying to help her, but all the other llamas went nuts and covered me in spit. I had a hulk moment and saved the day, but those little spitting bastards seriously pissed me off. No treats for you jackasses!

Wow, that's all I've got! I'll keep you posted on my riveting life!

OMMMMMMMMMM

I love yoga.
I love that no matter how good you get, you can always get better.
Its bizarre how it can be incredibly challenging, but calming at the same time. You should try it.
Do it, you know you want to :)

My life is like a bad sitcom...

Do you ever have those days when you wonder if you've somehow stumbled into an alternate universe??? You realize that you must have somehow fallen into crazy land, or got sucked into a wormhole shortly after waking up...
Yesterday I was in the Twilight Zone...

I decided to take Nyla to town for some 'mommy time'. Our plan was to get all decked out for Easter, so we headed to Walmart, completely unsuspecting the horror that we were about to experience.
As soon as I stepped through the door I knew that something was NOT right. Everything was loud, screechy and COUNTRY. We stood frozen by the entrance until the greeter (with a painful look on her face) pushed a cart into us. We took a few more steps and there, by the Easter display was the source of the pain and horror.... karaoke!! WHAT THE HELL!?
It was strange and confusing. I still don't know why they were doing karaoke at Walmart... all I know is that it was painfully bad. People were walking through the isles like zombies while crazy people belted out either country or gansta rap. At one point Nyla looked up at me with her beautiful eyes wide and said, "Mommy, can you please ask them to stop doing that???" If only...
We ended our Walmart shop early and pretty much had to punch out unsuspecting strangers in a race to the checkout. Finally, we were free.

but it didn't end there...

My dad is a member of a sportsman club here. Every year they have this big gun show at the arena... haha, big guns... :) My dad is quite elderly, and is not well, but every year he volunteers to do security. He stays the whole weekend, even sleeps there. So we usually go check how things are going.
At Walmart I got Nyla some big balloons to play with because the gun show is hideously boring. (I'm sure you can imagine... table after table of guns. Just guns... and weirdos). She was running around throwing her balloon in the air when it snagged on something and BANG! It was so freaking loud and of course echoed throughout the whole arena. good lord... loud bangs and arenas filled with gun toting weirdos are not a good combination. There was complete silence, then it was like a freaky ant hill. People went completely nuts... they were scurrying around trying to figure out who or what was shot, until they noticed a tiny little girl crying and holding the remnants of her prized balloon.
I swear I thought they were going to start shooting blindly into the air like that crazy cartoon guy.
I scooped up Nyla and tried to make a hasty exit, but unfortunately my dad called over the conservation officer dudes so we could discuss the best way to deal with our stupid bear. Apparently we live very close to where Alberta releases all of their trapped bears. GREAT CALL ALBERTA! I told him that our plan was to shoot it. He decided it would be great 'FUN' and wants to be in on it. At least he didn't say anything about me climbing into a trap to pour bacon grease on a rotten meat bag like his buddy did last year.
I swear, if I wake up and find a bunch of creepy dudes dressed in camo gear with fake trees strapped to their heads in my front yard I'm going to lose it.
In my opinion, these are all signs. Time to get out of here. I can't wait to pack our shite and drive away. It gives me the heebie jeebies...

Love fest

Some days I find that I'm giddily in love with my girls. I always love them, but some days I can't get enough of them. I smush them and cuddle them and sneek peeks at them... totally smitten. I can't hug them enough, I can't kiss them enough... sigh...
When I put Nyla to bed I lay down with her. We cuddle nose to nose as close as possible. We start out trying to make each other giggle with funny faces, then move on to making up stories. Eventually we end the story time with all of our goofy kisses..her favorite right now is the puppy kiss... yup, I lick her face:)
Every night its the same, and I LOVE it.
And Maren... she is so sweet. She's really into eye contact. She has an unwavering stare with big blue eyes... totally heart melting. She'll stare and stare then burst into a big fat grin. That little gummy face is beyond beautiful.
I always thought it was lame when people talked about their kids all the time, but now I understand. There is nobody on the planet as cool as these girls. Nobody comes close.

We had a great day yesterday. It was warm enough for everyone, including Maren to go outside. We have the perfect tobogganing hill in the llama pasture. Llamas are surprisingly into tobogganing. When we'd make a run down the hill they'd all run behind us down the path we made. It was almost like they thought they were doing the same thing we were. I wish I had my camera out because it was freak show and funny at the same time.
I had my first Llama related accident. I'm trying to halter train them, so some are a bit spooked. We have a big stupid dog who likes to sneak up behind them and spaz out until they in turn begin to spaz out and run spazzily as fast and far away as possible. I, unfortunately, was in the path of one of them when it decided to spaz and run. She didn't see me, she just whipped around and ran without thinking... right into me. This is where I'd normally swear like a sailor, but all I'll say is that it hurt like a mofo. Being chest-bumped by a llama sucks rats asses. I'm proud of myself though. I didn't go all Chuck Norris on the llama, I stayed remarkably calm. I am a picture of maturity and poise...

Has everyone else been realizing that its march and still surprisingly winterish? Are we the only ones STILL getting blizzards??? Am I the only one starting to twitch about this a bit?

I'm going to go stare into some beautiful baby eyes :) peace out homeslice...

Gotta love an artist

We've been under quarantine in order to avoid sickness since we arrived home with Maren. I'm not sure how it happened, but we're all sick. It isn't serious, and Maren seems to be doing pretty well so far, so yaaay for that! Nyla on the other hand is really not feeling well. Usually on days like this where she's so sad and yucky feeling we do some fun crafts because she isn't up to tearing around the house as usual.
It all started when I put a big hand print on her tummy... she laughed so freaking hard, so of course I had to keep going. She started painting her feet and asked for some 'kitty whiskers' so, as you can see, she got them.
She loves painting, she talks about how mixing colors together makes all the colors in the whole world :) I love the way she thinks about things.
So, we had a good day.
We had to go out and hang with the llamas while our hay was being delivered.. its interesting how people can be so afraid of llamas. Its not like they're going to gouge your eyes out or wear your head for a hat or anything. I realize how nardo I am, but I get kicks out of telling people to run because one of the llamas is getting ready to spit at them. Lame?? yes, but funny when someone starts sprinting away??? oooooh yes. I think its even more funny when someone is obviously afraid but is trying to be a big man and pretending not to be, then takes off running when a llama gets within 5 feet of him... mwahahahahahaaahahahaa! Ohhhhh the humor of a panic stricken face :)
Yes, I'm mean. And yes, I have the benefit of experience with these furry dudes, but I have to get my kicks somewhere right??? I can't even pretend I want to try to be a better person :)